Constructive feedback examples, with scripts
Constructive feedback names one specific situation, the behavior you saw, its impact, and what you'd like instead, then asks for the other person's view. Below are scripts for the situations managers face most, plus versions for a peer and your boss.
Lauren is a real coach. You're texting an AI trained on her coaching.
The formula
Situation, behavior, impact, request. Then ask a question.
"In Monday's planning meeting (situation), you interrupted Dana twice while she was presenting (behavior). She didn't finish her point, and we lost her input on the timeline (impact). I'd like you to let people finish before responding (request). How did it look from your side?"
Keep it to one issue per conversation, have it privately, and have it soon. Feedback about something from three months ago turns into a debate about memory.
Missed deadlines
I want to talk about the last two deadlines. The [report] came in two days late, and [deliverable] was a day late. Both times I found out on the day it was due.
The late notice is the bigger problem. I couldn't warn the client.
Going forward, if something's going to slip, I need to know as soon as you see it. What's been getting in the way?
Interrupting or dominating meetings
In this morning's meeting, you jumped in before [name] finished her point, twice.
I value your ideas, and I need everyone's in the room. When people get cut off, they stop offering them.
Would you try letting people finish, then building on what they said?
Errors in the work
The [deck] that went to [client] had two wrong figures on page four. They caught it, and it cost us some credibility.
I know the deadline was tight. I need a final check on numbers before anything goes to a client.
Would a checklist help, or is something else making that hard right now?
Feedback that's too blunt
I want to share something about how your feedback lands. Your comments on [name]'s draft were accurate, and the tone made her want to stop sharing drafts.
I'd like you to keep the honesty and add the why behind each comment.
You see problems quickly, and that's valuable. I want people to want your input.
A manager who won't delegate
I've noticed you're still doing most of the [type of work] yourself, often at night.
It's costing you, and it means [name] and [name] aren't learning it.
For the next project, I'd like you to hand off [part] completely and coach them through it. What would make that feel less risky?
Feedback to a peer
Can I share something that would help me work better with you?
When the specs change after we've started building, like on [project] last week, we lose a few days of work.
Could we agree that any change after kickoff comes with a quick heads-up in the channel? I'm happy to do the same on my side.
Feedback to your boss
Can I give you some feedback on how priorities reach the team?
The last two changes came to us without the reason behind them, and it was hard to answer the team's questions.
Even a sentence on the why would help me back the decision. Would that be possible?
Mistakes to skip
- The compliment sandwich. People learn to wait for the "but", and your praise stops meaning anything.
- Labels. "You're careless" starts a fight. "Two figures on page four were wrong" starts a fix.
- "People are saying." Speak from what you saw, or don't say it.
- Doing it by email. Written feedback has no tone and no chance to ask questions. Talk first, then recap in writing.
- No request. Feedback without a clear "what I'd like instead" leaves people guessing.
Rehearse it with Lauren
need to give feedback to a peer who keeps changing the specs on us mid-sprint. he's senior to me
peer feedback up the ladder is tricky. good news: you can frame it as a shared problem
what's it cost your team when he changes things?
we lost 3 days last sprint rebuilding the checkout flow
lead with that, and offer something back: "When the specs changed mid-sprint last week, we lost three days rebuilding checkout. Could we agree that changes after kickoff come with a heads-up in the channel? I'll do the same for anything from my side." it's a request, not a complaint
Say it once, clearly.
Text Lauren the situation. She'll help you find the specific example and the request, and rehearse it with you.
Hi Lauren! I need to give someone constructive feedback and want help with the words.
Lauren is a real coach. You're texting an AI trained on her coaching. Your first week is free. Cancel anytime from your account or by texting Lauren.
Frequently asked questions
What is an example of constructive feedback?
"In Monday's meeting, you interrupted Dana twice while she was presenting, and we lost her input on the timeline. I'd like you to let people finish before responding. How did it look from your side?"
What's the difference between constructive and negative feedback?
Constructive feedback is specific, about behavior rather than personality, and includes what you'd like instead. Negative feedback just names what was wrong, which is hard to act on.
How do you give constructive feedback to your boss?
Ask permission, focus on the effect on your work, and make one clear request: "When priorities change without the reason, it's hard to answer the team's questions. Even one sentence on the why would help."
Should constructive feedback be given in writing?
Have the conversation first, in person or on video, so tone and questions can happen in real time. Then send a short written recap of what you agreed.